Seeing biblical teachings being reversed into conservative teachings is one of the funniest things holy shit. Like this makes it painfully clear that Jesus taught the exact opposite of all these things yet conservatives in the US wanna call themselves “men of god”.
Me: *Removes my cat from my lap to do something else.*
My cat: Father is...evil? Father is unyielding? Father is incapable of love? I am running away. I am packing my little rucksack and going out to explore the world as a lone vagabond. I can no longer thrive in this household.
the new halloween movie looks great
This is hilarious but I cannot stress enough never ever plug a strange USB into your computer Jesus Christ. You will get PC Chlamydia and die.
for real babes there’s tons of programs that can activate straight from a usb and you don’t even have to click on anything. there’s this really interesting one that fries your whole computer by making it overheat itself so that pieces start melting together.
be careful of strange data sticks
Professional computer guy here always stick weird flash drives into your computer it’s fun and sometimes you get to see Mikey’s meat
lying to people in positions of power (landlords, rental agencies, employers) to get what u want (a flat, a job, whatever) is cool and u should do it more often.
maybe it’s the Older Sibling in me but lying to people outright, by omission, or by implication is a useful skill. if the landlord says it’s not a party flat tell them you’re relieved to hear that because you hated living with people who had people over a lot. no you didn’t meet your future roommates through a facebook flatmate searching group, you met through mutual friends. you’re neurotypical and love working with people, customer service is your passion! you used to do tons of volunteer work in high school while also juggling extracurriculars and maintaining good grades which shows you’re really good at time management and like being busy, nevermind the fact that your school required you to do those volunteer hours. lie on the spot! adapt! you too can be the perfect person for every single situation! don’t feel bad about it! there’s no reason to be honest as long as it won’t directly be clockable as a lie!
doomsday preppers always keeping rusty tins of food in their basement but never building springhouses and smokehouses and paddocks for future livestock 🤨 those canned peaches are only going to bring you so far babe
are you going to study medicinal herbs and their cultivation or are you just going to keep stockpiling weapons like a little bitch 😩
going to shoot your way out of an infected cut, dumbass?
CAPTCHA 1: check this box
CAPTCHA 2: select all the rivers
CAPTCHA 3: which of these tiny pictures has an apple in it
CAPTCHA 4: can you find where you went wrong in your life
CAPTCHA 5: select the reasons why my wife left me